I've Never: FFVIII style!
by Requiem Wolf
Summary: The boys of FFVIII decide to play a game; but the out come isn't what they expected. In this game you learn more about people than you ever wanted.


" Hey guys gather round we'll play a game

I've Never:

Final Fantasy VIII Style!

I don't own anyone in this fic, and all that other mother-jazz.

" Hey guys gather round we'll play a game. " Seifer his comrades who all began to filter around Seifer and his large pitcher of beer.

" So what are we playing?" Irvine said sitting next to Squall and Zell.

" A drinking game, called I've never.Does everyone know how to play? "

" No. "Squall was already trying to leave, but Irvine and Zell stopped him.

"Irvine I know you've played this so you explain. "

"Well, we all say something that we've never done and everyone who has done that thing takes a drink. Do you get it?"Squall looked at him, " What's the point?"

" To be the last one standing of course. " Seifer said, " Since it was my idea I'll go first.I've never…jerked off in public. "

Irvine and Zell sipped their beers.Squall looked at Zell and moved closer to Seifer.

" Irvie I'd expect but Zell I'm surprised. Do tell."

" Well I was-" 

" –On second thought I don't wanna know. " Seifer interrupted. " Squall your turn. "

" ….I've never….pissed my pants in a movie. "Zell took another drink.

" Zell you're ups. "

" I've never, danced naked. "

Everyone but Zell took a drink and looked at each other.

" Well now that it's my turn I'm gonna make it good. Hmmmm, now lets see what have I never done…no, that's a bad one.Hang on guys this could take awhile."Seifer decided to pick up the conversation, " Hey Squall what do you do without any wars? "

" Nothin'. What did you think?I played golf? "

" Not golf, I didn't think you could hit the ball." 

" That's true I can't, even if I did Rinoa would find me, " Squall shuddered atthe mention of his Ex's name. " Do you see her anywhere? "Seifer looked around the bar, he saw a woman that looked farmiliar but wasn't Rinoa so he dismissed her as coincidence.

" No, you're safe.Hey, how's it commin' Irv? "

" Nothin' yet. "

" Well just say something. " Zell whined.

" Okay, okay.I've got one.I've never….I lost it."Squall groaned and smacked his head on the table.

" I'm not getting any drunker over here. " Seifer said and shook his glass showing that it was still very full.

" Well there's a lot of things I could use but I've done them all too."

" That's it! " Seifer knew something had to be done and there was only one solution, change the rules. " We'll play it Makai's way.She plays that you can say it even if you've done it, but you still have to drink."

" Okay! Then that makes it easier. I've never shaved my genitals. "Irvine took a sip of his beer and so did every one else.Squall suddenly began to regret playing this game.

It was Seifer's turn and Squall was very, very afraid. No one had a mind like Seifer's.When Seifer closed his eyes to think more deeply Squall did the same mostly to pray. 

" Ok, I've never drank cum. " 

" What's cum?" Zell asked 

" Seifer pick a different one, I really don't wanna explain. "Squall said, his hand on his forehead.

" Fine, I've never performed a striptease. " Seifer drank, as did Irvine.

" Squall, w-"

" Never mind. "Squall said his head was throbbing.

" Okay man, make this a good one. " Squall watched Seifer's little foam mustache move.

" I don't have any good ones. But let me think." 

" Don't hurt yourself there big guy. " Seifer mocked

" Shut the hell up. I've got it!!" Squall's face lit up.

_Oh no, Squall is happy.Ok this is bad. _Seifer thought.

" I've never fallen in a urinal. "Zell and Irvine drank; Zell a sip but Irvine poured the rest of his glass down his throat.

" I was drunk, very drunk." Irvine said to no one as he poured himself a new glass.

" Right, that makes sense.And Zell, what's your excuse? " Seifer said looking at Zell more interested in what Zell had to say than he'd ever been.Zell took a deep breath, and began his story, " I was really little and I had to, you know reach. Well I lost my footing and I slipped and there was this huge man next to me.Now he just looked at me and said, " THERE YOU GO LITTLE GUY. " and he picked me up.Okay my turn, I've never raped anyone. "No one drank." I just wanted to make sure that you hadn't Seifer. "

" That's understandable. " Seifer said,_ He's really nice when he's drunk_. Zell thought.

" I can't think of anything, do I have to go? " Irvine was getting more and more addled." Okay I've never thought _that way_ about other guys. "Zell drank.

Everyone's gaze shifted to Zell, " What? " was all he could say.

" I told you he was gay. " Seifer said.

" Well you're wrong about everything. " Irvine replied.

" What?! "

" You heard me knight boy. "

" Comere! "

The two fell on the floor, punching and kicking neither one of them was armed.Seifer quickly gained the upper-hand, he sat on Irvine's stomach and started belting him in the face with punch after punch.A circle formed around them as people started to take bets, everyone in the bar seemed to be in that circle.Everyone except Squall and Zell,as soon as the fight broke out they took a cab to Balamb Hotel ( where no questions were asked )

Owari!!!


End file.
